Art
of Flirting
Flirting
is the way most people
determine whether or not a
member of the opposite sex is
interested in them.
Following is a quick outline
on how you should go about the
complex, sometimes fun,
sometimes not so fun, task of
flirting. It all beings
with your approach.
The
Approach
One
person approaches the other.
They move into closer physical
proximity. This much is clear:
NO approach equals NO
possibility of initiating
contact. You must
approach!
Example:
A woman sits down next to a
man in a coffee shop, or a man
stands near a woman in a dance
club. This is the first
step. Once you approach,
you begin looking for the
signs.
The
Signs
The
person who has been approached
will always signal the
other’s presence in some
way…a sign. This signal is
not like a train whistle,
however, more a subtle body
language which you can learn
to recognize. For example, he
or she simply may look up,
move over to make room, nod
slightly, or signal with a
glancing eye contact.
A
display of total obliviousness
to the one who is approaching
generally indicates lack of
interest altogether.
Don’t be discouraged.
But if the one you approached
shows absolutely no interest,
then it’s time to re-group
and try again. But
let’s say the approach
works. You have your
positive acknowledgement, now
what? Time to talk
The
Verbal Exchange
The
two people may then engage in
a mild verbal exchange about
impersonal, unimportant
matters such as the weather or
the scene around them.
The key word here is MILD.
This
is the classic place for the
clever “line,” but
cleverness is not required. At
this point, a verbal exchange
is not for the purpose of
sharing valuable insights
about life or determining
philosophical compatibility.
It is just a vehicle to
further the developing
contact.
Examples:
Verbal overtures might include
anything from “please pass
the pickles” to “your
looking great tonight”, to
“have you seen the
waitress?”. Without some
form of verbal response, it is
highly unlikely that the next
step will occur. Let’s
say all is going as planned.
Time for body language.
Body
Language
Over
a period of time, a couple
that has begun to talk may
also begin to orient
themselves physically to one
another, to turn toward one
another until, if all is goes
well, they are fully facing
one another. This is
your goal.
This
step can take minutes or hours
. . . or weeks or months . . .
to achieve. Yet, without this
physical reorientation toward
one another, not very much can
ever happen, so give up on
people who turn their back
toward you for long periods of
time! But if they
don’t…
Touching
The
woman or the man (most often
the woman) touches the other
in a light, fleeting way.
Examples: A couple might
accidentally brush their hands
against one another while
reaching for a drink, or the
woman might pat the man on the
arm in the middle of a shared
joke. The exchange of very
subtle, almost glancing
touches may continue for some
while, and if all goes well,
can escalate into the casual
affections shown by couples
who are dating. If
you’ve reached this point,
then flirting has now become
the beginning of a
relationship. The Art of
Flirting should always end
with the beginning of a
relationship. Now get
out there and flirt.
The
Art of Flirting is really the
Art of making first contact.
You only have one shot at
making a great first
impression. By following
some of the guidelines we’ve
established in this article,
you should now be equipped to
locate, approach, and
ascertain whether or not your
subtle flirting has opened the
doors to a new and exciting
relationship.
My
name is Joe Vetromile, and
I’m an author/screenwriter
living in So. California.
I’ve written hundreds of
articles on the subjects of
flirting, dating and
breaking-up. Besides having
first hand experience with all
three, my research on the art
of dating confirms to me that
while the ritual of hooking up
with a soul-mate may be
arduous at times, the end
result of finding that perfect
someone to share the rest of
your life with, is well worth
the effort.
Joe Vetromile writes for DrDating
– a web site for anyone
looking for love online. We
have hundreds of articles,
E-Books and links to some
great dating and love sites
all over the world. DrDating
also offers reviews of some of
the most popular dating sites
and books.
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